Communication exercises

On Saturday night we will meet for a media meeting.
The meeting is free to the general public and a small food donation can be brought.
During the media meeting we will divide into pairs.
The pair sits facing each other at a comfortable distance but not touching each other.
On one side, the ‘listener’ gives instructions to the other side.

“Tell me about a problem you’ve been having in your life lately.”

Once the instruction has been given and the ‘calling’ partner has received it. The ‘listener’ listens, without criticism or support, and tries to understand what the other party is saying.
The other party, the ‘calling’, receives the instruction, and returns with a problem they have recently had. Communication is verbal and in addition any way that will help them convey the issue to the ‘listening’ partner.
After a ‘headline’ explaining the problem has been said, the caller says “That’s it” or “I’m done.”
The ‘listener’ says “Thank you” (for responding to the instruction he gave). And gives the second instruction:

“Tell me what I need to know to fully understand this problem.”

The ‘communicating’ partner now says everything they think their partner needs to know to fully understand the problem.

After the caller finishes, he says “That’s it” or “I’m done.” The listener says “Thank you” (for responding to the second instruction he gave). And gives the first instruction again, and the cycle continues.

After 5 minutes, a gong will sound and the partners will switch roles. The ‘listener’ becomes the ‘communicator’ and vice versa. During a practice of about 40 minutes, each of them will be 4 times ‘communicator’ and 4 times ‘listener’.

After 40 minutes, there will be a break and we will switch partners. During a communication session, there will be two rounds of communication of 40 minutes each.

In the first few times, it is advisable that partners or people who have a relationship do not work with each other.

At the stage where you become the ‘communicator’ after listening to your partner, do not comment or respond to what he said earlier when he communicated.

Key point:

Don’t try to solve your own problem. Tell your partner everything you think he or she needs to know to understand the problem. If you focus on that, the current problem will be solved more quickly.

Tips:

• Explain the problem and also convey how you feel about the problem;
• The nature of the problem can change as you go along. Restate it as you see it now when your partner gives you the first instruction at the beginning of every five minutes.

Remember that a current problem can dissolve into nothingness at any point in the exercise. If it does, switch to a new problem immediately, even if you are in the middle of your turn.
Simply say something like, “I am going to work on a new problem, give me the first instruction again.”
The five-minute style of communication exercises works particularly well.
The five-minute sound may be distracting, but when it is your turn to communicate again, simply return to the problem as you see it now, and continue when you receive the second instruction.

Good instructions for communication exercises:

Tell me something about yourself that you think others don’t understand.

Alternative version:

Tell me what others don’t accept about you.

Another key point here is that it should be primarily about you, not others.

Another point is that it should also be ‘something’ and not just a long story. Look for something real about yourself.

Tell me what purpose you have for life.

Tell me what you can take responsibility for regarding this goal?

Take some time to explain the goal and convey it to your partner. You can nod to indicate that you are finished. Your partner then says ‘thank you’ and gives the second part of the instruction.

The following five instructions are self-explanatory, and are good introductory exercises for those who have never done communication exercises.
Do one or two five-minute exchanges for each of them.
Those who are well-versed in the communication exercises can continue more times with each one.

Tell me something that matters to you.

Tell me something about someone who matters to you.

Tell me something about a time when you felt loved.

Tell me something you love about life.

Tell me something you did in life that you felt good about.

The following two instructions can go very deep. You don’t have to use them together, each one is powerful on its own. You can get to a very good or even very deep place if you do them.

Focus on your body and tell me what you become aware of.

Accept yourself as you are and tell me what you are aware of.